Blog 2 Week 2

1.             I don’t have children.  About 5 years ago I was sure I wanted to have kids.  I am now 31, single, and have completely forgot about or misplaced my ticking clock from 5 years ago.  I still think I want to be a mom, but not being in a relationship or having found someone even close to what I would want is making me rethink things.  That being said, I still have time, and have always been of the “if it is meant to be it is meant to be” mentality.
               I found the following sections in chapter 2 to be an interesting read, especially since I have never been through the process of childbirth:  Approaches to Childbirth (pg. 71-72), Adjusting to Parenthood (pg. 72-73) and Birth Complications (pg. 73-76). 
               After reading these sections, first of all, I hope I have a pain-free(ish) natural delivery if I ever have children.  I think it is interesting that a woman is more likely to experience less issues when she knows what the heck is going on during her pregnancy and labor/delivery.  I guess that makes sense, but also, it would seem to still be tough for a first time mother (like is that a contraction or am I dying?). 
               I never thought about anesthesia and the delivery of the baby.  I have always only thought about the pain in regards to the anesthesia.  The section on approaches to childbirth states that less is more when it comes to pain medication, and that natural techniques are preferable.  This is due to the woman not being able to use her abdominal muscles during the delivery and thus, special equipment might need to be used that could potentially harm the baby.
               Another scary occurrence which is more and more common in our society is postpartum depression.  A week or maybe two of crying, irritation, resentment, that’s normal.  Babies need mothers who pay attention, are nurturing, who talk and cuddle with them.  If they don’t receive this type of care for their first couple weeks it shouldn’t have long term effects.  However, if the mother continues to be apathetic and distant, the child becomes at risk for depression and other behavior problems.  On a personal note, I would be extremely likely to suffer from this condition, so at least I have a shot at recognizing my own behavior and seek help before it has damaging effects on my baby. 
               In general, women who are healthy when they get pregnant typically have normal pregnancy, labor and delivery.  It is more common to have complications when there is inadequate prenatal care or malnutrition.  A child that has birth complications is more like to become aggressive or violent, and for developing mental illness such as schizophrenia.  If a tough life follows (i.e. poverty, adversity, and other hardships) the likelihood increases.
               After reading these sections in detail, I definitely still think I want to have kids, but I will probably be a combination of nurturing/controlling/hyper-focused on what the learn and who they learn it from.  I have heard the saying that we improved upon the previous generation, so I am not sure exactly how I was raised, but my goodness, I would like to be the best mom possible.  And coolest.
    
2. Since I have never had children, I Googled a topic that relates.  I was interested in reading a little more about mother-child bonding, and I researched the following website:
    
   http://www.k-state.edu/media/newsreleases/may11/motherchild50611.html
    
               The brief article is “A powerful connection: mother-child bond plays a role in child’s growth, development”.  In summation, children are very much aware of their mother through the feelings/emotions they relate to her.  Though these roles can be reversed, typically children look to the mother for comfort, and the father for protection.  Mom is the nurturer and Dad is the protector. 
   The mother is a role model for her son because she teaches him respect and about affection and love.  This is true of the biological mother or stepmother.  The mother also plays a role for her daughter so she grows up like her.  Ideally.
               The mother is supposed to tell her children how she feels since they can pick up on emotion quite easily.  Children assign themselves blame if they think their mother is upset, even though in reality she is probably just upset at someone else.  This would have consequences on the child’s development due to the deep connection and trust they have in their mother.
    
3.             I personally would like to learn more about what happens when a mother goes undiagnosed for postpartum depression, or when it continues for more than a few weeks.  It really only because widely talked about in the late 90’s from what I recall.  I think it is potentially one of those cycles that can be nearly impossible to break if the issue isn’t brought up by the mother or the father or even the grandparents. 
               If I had unlimited time and energy and money I would like to study the development of monkeys at the 1 to 3 week interval, and if their mother is showing signs of postpartum depression.  I would imagine it is possible for them to suffer from the same condition, or at least something like it.  I would really like to know if children raised with a mother who has postpartum depression grow up without empathy.